Thursday, August 28, 2008
This is the first photo ever taken of Michael Phelps
This is the first photo ever taken of Michael Phelps
ITALIAN BOY'S CONFESSION
ITALIAN BOY'S CONFESSION
Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl'.
The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano ?'
'Yes, Father, it is.'
'And who was the girl you were with?'
'I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation'
Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later, so you may as
well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?'
'I cannot say.'
'Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?'
'I'll never tell.'
'Was it Nina Capelli?'
'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.'
'Was it Cathy Piriano?'
'My lips are sealed.'
'Was it Rosa Di Angelo, then?'
'Please, Father, I cannot tell you.'
The priest sighs in frustration. 'You're very tight lipped, Joey Pagano,
and I admire that. But
you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months. Now you
go and behave yourself.'
Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and
whispers, 'What'd you get?'
Joey said, "4 months vacation and five good leads.'
Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl'.
The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano ?'
'Yes, Father, it is.'
'And who was the girl you were with?'
'I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation'
Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later, so you may as
well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?'
'I cannot say.'
'Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?'
'I'll never tell.'
'Was it Nina Capelli?'
'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.'
'Was it Cathy Piriano?'
'My lips are sealed.'
'Was it Rosa Di Angelo, then?'
'Please, Father, I cannot tell you.'
The priest sighs in frustration. 'You're very tight lipped, Joey Pagano,
and I admire that. But
you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months. Now you
go and behave yourself.'
Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and
whispers, 'What'd you get?'
Joey said, "4 months vacation and five good leads.'
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Hedge Clippers
Hedge Clippers
A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two large plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. Unfortunately, there's a rip in one of the bags, and every once in a while a $20 note falls out onto the pavement. Noticing this, a policeman stops her.... 'Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of your bag ... 'Oh, really? Darn!' says the little old lady. 'I'd better go back and see if I can collect them. Thanks for the warning!' 'Well, now, not so fast,' says the cop. 'How did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?' 'Oh, no', says the little old lady. 'You see, my back yard is right next to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee through the bushes, right into my flower beds! So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time some one sticks his little thingie through the bushes, I say, '$20 or off it comes' 'Well, that seems only fair.' laughs the cop. 'OK, good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?' 'Well', says the little old lady, 'not everybody pays.'
A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two large plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. Unfortunately, there's a rip in one of the bags, and every once in a while a $20 note falls out onto the pavement. Noticing this, a policeman stops her.... 'Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of your bag ... 'Oh, really? Darn!' says the little old lady. 'I'd better go back and see if I can collect them. Thanks for the warning!' 'Well, now, not so fast,' says the cop. 'How did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?' 'Oh, no', says the little old lady. 'You see, my back yard is right next to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee through the bushes, right into my flower beds! So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time some one sticks his little thingie through the bushes, I say, '$20 or off it comes' 'Well, that seems only fair.' laughs the cop. 'OK, good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?' 'Well', says the little old lady, 'not everybody pays.'
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